1
00:00:18,219 --> 00:00:23,080
And when this magic bullet went into the
president's chest, it had to make a

2
00:00:23,080 --> 00:00:26,020
sharp turn in order to exit his body
from the neck.

3
00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:28,560
Then it would have had to turn right.

4
00:00:28,970 --> 00:00:33,510
then left, and somehow have enough
energy to hit the governor in the front

5
00:00:33,930 --> 00:00:36,190
Clearly the assassination was a
conspiracy.

6
00:00:37,510 --> 00:00:40,170
Thank you, Daria. That gave me the
chills.

7
00:00:40,530 --> 00:00:44,570
People, these have been some of the best
oral reports I've ever heard.

8
00:00:47,530 --> 00:00:48,530
Oral.

9
00:00:49,650 --> 00:00:51,290
I'm going to do an anal report.

10
00:00:54,410 --> 00:00:58,790
See, the last two people we've yet to
hear from are Beavis and Butthead. It's

11
00:00:58,790 --> 00:01:01,570
time for your reports on a historical
American figure.

12
00:01:03,430 --> 00:01:09,750
Uh... Now, Beavis and Butthead, if you
don't give your reports, I'll be forced

13
00:01:09,750 --> 00:01:11,950
to give you both Fs for the semester.

14
00:01:12,390 --> 00:01:13,390
Okay?

15
00:01:14,030 --> 00:01:15,250
Uh... Okay.

16
00:01:16,130 --> 00:01:17,130
Yes, of course.

17
00:01:20,150 --> 00:01:22,730
An F would mean being left back.

18
00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:26,680
Repeating the ninth grade?

19
00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:29,420
Uh, let's see.

20
00:01:29,620 --> 00:01:34,720
Uh, after nine of eight, nine, ten.

21
00:01:35,380 --> 00:01:38,980
Whoa, Beavis. That means we won't have
to be in the tenth grade.

22
00:01:40,080 --> 00:01:42,360
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's cool.

23
00:01:42,640 --> 00:01:44,640
You guys will never graduate.

24
00:01:45,060 --> 00:01:47,400
Uh, never masturbate?

25
00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:51,300
Graduate. It's when you're all done with
school.

26
00:01:51,740 --> 00:01:54,420
You mean like school ends?

27
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,780
That's right, Beavis. When you graduate,
you'll never have to attend another

28
00:01:58,780 --> 00:02:00,540
class again if you don't want to.

29
00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:05,220
But that's not going to happen unless
you pass American history, which means

30
00:02:05,220 --> 00:02:07,560
need to give your oral report right now.

31
00:02:07,940 --> 00:02:12,300
Okay? Uh, excuse me. Uh, I have an oral
report.

32
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:14,060
No, wait, me first.

33
00:02:14,940 --> 00:02:16,580
Shut up, Steve. It's my turn.

34
00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:19,320
No, wait, not this time.

35
00:02:20,060 --> 00:02:26,060
Um, my anal report is about, um, I mean,
my oral report is about, um,

36
00:02:26,100 --> 00:02:27,620
um, um.

37
00:02:29,040 --> 00:02:30,040
Uh, okay.

38
00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:35,260
Um... Um... It's, um... It's about,
um...

39
00:02:35,260 --> 00:02:38,700
Beavis, are you not prepared?

40
00:02:39,140 --> 00:02:45,300
No, wait, wait, wait. My report is on
the time me and Butthead had, um... Had,

41
00:02:45,420 --> 00:02:46,420
like, dinner and stuff.

42
00:02:47,120 --> 00:02:51,320
Now, Beavis, what does that have to do
with American history? Shut up! I'm not

43
00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:52,320
done yet.

44
00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:55,580
Beavis, this better be educational,
okay?

45
00:02:56,060 --> 00:02:57,920
Um... Okay, so, like, um...

46
00:02:58,510 --> 00:03:05,070
Once upon a time, I mean, like, last
week, we were going to, like, eat.

47
00:03:07,470 --> 00:03:08,890
Hey, what are you doing?

48
00:03:10,350 --> 00:03:11,350
Look.

49
00:03:13,930 --> 00:03:14,930
Oh, yeah.

50
00:03:18,330 --> 00:03:19,570
That was cool.

51
00:03:19,950 --> 00:03:22,070
I mean, that was, um...

52
00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:28,700
Educational. And then we were sitting
there... Hey,

53
00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:30,760
Beavis.

54
00:03:32,900 --> 00:03:37,340
If you, like, look at the window, you
can stare at chicks and they can't see

55
00:03:37,340 --> 00:03:38,340
you.

56
00:03:39,300 --> 00:03:41,020
Really? Cool.

57
00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:46,380
It's not working.

58
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:49,320
No, dumbass. Over there.

59
00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:54,720
This is cool.

60
00:03:59,300 --> 00:04:03,020
That dinner, like, changed my life and
stuff.

61
00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,340
Yeah, and like, I'll never forget it.

62
00:04:08,200 --> 00:04:09,200
The end.

63
00:04:10,180 --> 00:04:13,640
Beavis, that was the worst report I have
ever heard.

64
00:04:13,980 --> 00:04:16,980
What did your report have to do with
American history?

65
00:04:17,740 --> 00:04:20,160
Well, it happened last week.

66
00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:22,860
And I was like, in America.

67
00:04:23,700 --> 00:04:24,920
So I was like, history.

68
00:04:26,360 --> 00:04:27,360
Pretty cool.

69
00:04:27,900 --> 00:04:28,900
Thank you very much.

70
00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:35,980
Well, for making an effort, Beavis,
albeit a very weak one, I'm going to

71
00:04:35,980 --> 00:04:36,980
you a D -.

72
00:04:37,600 --> 00:04:39,220
Yes. Cool.

73
00:04:39,980 --> 00:04:40,980
Whoa.

74
00:04:41,580 --> 00:04:42,800
That ruled.

75
00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:48,620
Now, Butthead, please make your report
about a figure in American history.

76
00:04:49,180 --> 00:04:50,680
Uh, okay.

77
00:04:52,310 --> 00:04:58,430
Uh, my report is, uh, my report is about
the time I kicked Beavis in the nads

78
00:04:58,430 --> 00:05:00,030
and he was, like, passed out all day.

79
00:05:04,050 --> 00:05:07,590
Butthead. He, like, turned blue and
stopped breathing.

80
00:05:08,130 --> 00:05:09,130
Butthead.

81
00:05:09,970 --> 00:05:12,230
Then, like, he couldn't remember his
name.

82
00:05:12,750 --> 00:05:15,930
All right, Butthead, I'll give you a D-,
okay?

83
00:05:17,370 --> 00:05:18,370
The end.

84
00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:21,080
We're going to graduate.

85
00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:27,320
Hey,

86
00:05:28,540 --> 00:05:31,800
buddy, how are you thinking? Shut up,
Beavis. Oh, my God.

87
00:05:32,180 --> 00:05:35,720
You may be about to see the coolest
video you have ever seen in your life.

88
00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:37,560
Now, Beavis.

89
00:05:41,380 --> 00:05:42,380
Beavis.

90
00:05:46,160 --> 00:05:47,160
Beavis.

91
00:05:53,499 --> 00:05:56,640
This guy's probably just like a stuntman
or something.

92
00:05:57,060 --> 00:05:58,920
I bet he's not even in the band, huh?

93
00:06:02,180 --> 00:06:04,760
Like, what's this song supposed to be
about, anyway?

94
00:06:07,620 --> 00:06:08,620
Whoa.

95
00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:15,060
Look at that dude back there.

96
00:06:19,040 --> 00:06:20,040
Beavis.

97
00:06:21,260 --> 00:06:22,780
Beavis? Are you there?

98
00:06:24,940 --> 00:06:26,520
Beavis, what's your problem?

99
00:06:32,220 --> 00:06:36,140
Beavis, it's not even real. It's just,
like, specially packed.

100
00:06:38,980 --> 00:06:40,140
Oh, no.

101
00:06:41,020 --> 00:06:42,400
Oh, no.

102
00:06:43,220 --> 00:06:44,520
This is cool.

103
00:06:45,840 --> 00:06:48,160
This is a damn good video.

104
00:06:53,100 --> 00:06:56,140
It's like... Beavis, are you going to
say anything?

105
00:06:56,580 --> 00:06:57,580
No.

106
00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:59,860
Damn it, Beavis. Nap out of it.

107
00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:04,020
Dumbass. I'm going to change your
channel. Butthead, I'm only going to

108
00:07:04,020 --> 00:07:06,380
this once. If you touch that remote, I'm
going to kick your ass.

109
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:07,600
Yeah, right.

110
00:07:09,020 --> 00:07:11,320
Damn it, Beavis. Nap out of it right
now.

111
00:07:20,750 --> 00:07:22,310
Uh, you're right here, Beaver.

112
00:07:24,070 --> 00:07:25,070
What's your problem?

113
00:07:25,310 --> 00:07:29,110
Oh, I just, like, just, like, blacked
out or something. What's going on?

114
00:07:30,270 --> 00:07:32,630
We just saw a dude running around on
fire.

115
00:07:32,970 --> 00:07:34,130
No way, really? And I missed it?

116
00:07:34,510 --> 00:07:36,990
Uh, no, you saw the whole thing,
dumbass.

117
00:07:37,210 --> 00:07:38,210
Wow.

118
00:07:38,470 --> 00:07:40,450
I don't know. I wasn't here.

119
00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:45,050
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